Do you have this person in your life?

2012

 

I told my mother – “ Mom, I want to join a CAT coaching center”

 

2013

 

I told my friend – “You should join a coaching center for Civil services preparation.”

 

2014

 

Friend asked – “ Can you shift to my hostel? We shall study together.”

 

2015

 

Colleague – “ Send me the study plan. Let’s stick to it.”

 

2016

 

Friend asked – “ You have not been writing these days?”

 

2017

 

Friend – “ You are going to pay me 100 Rs everytime you break the challenge.”

 

Do you see some pattern in the above statements?

 

One thread which passess through all these years is accountability. I either wanted an accountability pattern or suggested a friend to find an accountability partner or been an accountability partner.

 

Why do you need an accountability partner?

 

1.Stick to schedule

 

I am good with subjects. But I needed a proper schedule and people to stick to it. A coaching center solved it for me.Combined studies with the right group forces you to stick to schedule.

After the studying phase got over, I found an accountability partner for self-improvement. I need to pay a fine if I break my schedule.

 

2.Motivation

 

If you are looking for external motivation, an accountability partner will help you with it. Every time you don’t feel like doing, there is a person who is going to question you. A friend of mine asked me to keep asking him if he has posted him first article. I have been asking him as a reminder and he feels forced to do it.

 

3.Guilt Trip

 

I made you, my reader, as an accountability partner. When I skip my goal on any day, I feel guilty. I ask myself “ If you want to skip this routine today, what will you write on your blog at the end of the month?”

 

4.Make you keep going forward

 

Accountability partner challenges you into something every now and then. You will have to accept the challenge which in turn sets you onto a fast track mode.

 

How to find an accountability partner?

 

1.Clubs:

 

My friend goes to a writing club every Saturday evening. He has to present to the club members his poems every week. That improved his poetry skills dramatically.

 

2.Online groups

 

There are tribes on many websites where the members of each tribe hold each other accountable for the progress they are making.

 

3.Join communities

 

Like how I joined a coaching center, you can join an organisation or a community wherever they share your interest. A like minded group fosters growth.

 

4.Friend

 

If you have a friend who is already doing well, you can ask him to be an accountability partner. When my friend asked me to be her accountability partner, both of us studied even more seriously than before.

 

Mistakes in selecting an accountability partner

 

1.Approach a person online who you think is doing well:

 

The person you reached out to might be the best in your field. But he has his own life, priorities and commitments. He must have even had his own mentor and accountability partner too. Why should he be your accountability partner?

 

2.Ask a person who has the capacity to hurt you

 

Accountability is about discipline. But discipline need not necessarily be in a negative way. He can make you pay for the missed schedules but he should not taunt you and make you feel low about yourself.

 

3.Asking just another friend

 

I once had this friend as an accountability partner. I went to her place over the weekend to study. But all we did was cook, eat and sleep. I decided not to go to her place any time again for studying. Because she was not serious about it in the first place.

 

How to set the rules?

 

1.Agree on the schedule

 

I agreed to check on my friend if she wrote her resume or not every day.

 

2.Explain the task/activity/challenge clearly

 

“I challenge you to write 1000 words daily. Writing on quora or diary does not count.” In this case, the rules of challenge are clear.

 

3.Agree on the consequences

 

My friend challenged me to run everyday for 90 days. In case I miss any day, the challenge will start from the beginning again.

 

A lot of people cry about not having a mentor. Even if you can’t find a mentor, an accountability partner will push you forward in life.

 

Do you have any accountability partner? Let us know in the comment section.

 

Happy finding your accountability partner!