2020 Aug Review and September goals

Every year, I write a list of new activities I want to pick up. One such item which was on the list for the past 4 years finally is off the check list in 2020. This was none other than Chess. My husband and I play at least one game of chess every night after dinner. Since both of us were new, the first few days when I won every game he attributed it to my meditation. To up his game, he started practising online too with computers and other players. Now my only chess teacher is my husband. We discuss the learnings after every game irrespective of who wins.
 

Review of August

 
1.Mindful Walking
 
Even though I had a very small target of just 10 steps daily, this has changed my style of walking forever. I am someone who is always on the run. Now when I am running in the house too, I remind myself of mindfulness. 
 
2.Thank you notebook
 
I haven’t covered this with a lot of names yet. But I made it a point to add one statement everyday. To make it a tough and useful exercise, I started by writing thank you notes for people who I find it very difficult to be thankful for.
 
3.Books
 
I finished reading How to walk, Breaking the habit of being yourself, The surrender experiment, Write it down, make it happen, Three Thousand Stitches. I started 10 x rule, Journeys of a lifetime but these will take time to finish. I am currently reading Autobiography of a yogi.
 

Plans for September

 
1.Plank
 
I can stay in a plank for 37 seconds without a lot of effort. In order to improve my core stability, I want to try this everyday till I reach 120 seconds effortlessly. I will not make it difficult. Instead I will target for 1 second more daily.
 
2.Record a 30 sec video of myself
 
I am a camera shy person. It has been a really long time since I addressed a huge gathering. In order to not let fear creep in, I want to practise 30 sec – 1 minute video of myself. This helps me identify my choice of words and body language to work on improving them.
 
How was your August? What are your plans for September?
 
Happy September!
 

Book Review – The untethered soul

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If there is one book which I referred to everyone I spoke to since I read it, it is Untethered soul. The book has a soul which moves your soul to do what is the need of the hour. I read so many books on spirituality and awareness but no other book could convince me the need for meditation as much as this book did. It is one of the best reads of 2020. You may find the concept repetitive but it is just to drive home the point. The analogies Singer uses makes the concepts imprinted in your mind for future retrieval. 
 

Summary

 
Ch1 The voice inside your head
 
When energy builds up inside, you want to do something about it. When you talk, that energy gets released.
 
Ch 2 Your inner roommate
 
The inner roommate keeps chattering all the time. No solution is possible if you are lost in the energy of the problem. “Who sees this? Who notices the inner disturbance” Asking these questions is the solution to your every problem.
 
Ch3 Who are you?
 
Exploring the question “Who am I?” helps you go deeper inside.
 
Ch4 The Lucid self
 
Our awareness is constantly lost in the objects around us. Whenever you want to recenter, say hello to the inside world and listen to the voice
 
Ch5 Infinite energy
 
There is infinite energy available. Food doesn’t help much when you are mentally and emotionally drained. But when you are in love, you have unlimited energy and you are never tired. To unlock this unlimited energy all the time, you need to be open and receptive. You block your heart to situations based on your previous experiences but that is just cutting you from your source of energy but not really protecting you.
 
Ch6 The secrets of spiritual heart
 
When you keep closing your heart, you start storing energy patterns called samskaras. Once they fill up, it will lead to a state of depression. 
 
Ch7 Transcending the tendency to close
 
The more you protect yourself, there is little spontaneous joy and excitement. When you start watching your thoughts and stop blocking your heart, the real spiritual growth happens and you feel the change in energy levels
 
Ch8 Let go now or fall
 
Life gives you problems to grow. If you start protecting yourself from problems, they will get tougher. If you let go in the beginning, a growth happens and it doesn’t reoccur.
 
Ch9 Removing your inner thorn
 
When you have an insecurity inside you and you avoid situations which will activate them will not help in your growth. When it gets activated, notice it like a third person.
 
Ch10 Stealing freedom from your soul
 
Mind always tells you that you need to change the outside world to fix your inner problems. Relieve the mind from its job of fixing the outside world for you. When it tells you to do something, don’t participate in the conversation.
 
Ch11 Pain, the price of freedom
 
Change involves challenging what is familiar to us and daring to question our traditional needs for safety, comfort and control. 
 
Ch12 Taking down the walls
 
The more you sit in the seat of witness, the more you feel independent.
 
Ch 13 Far, far beyond
 
To go beyond, you must keep going past the limits that you put on things. Your mental model bothers you, because it doesn’t incorporate reality. When you stop doing things which make you comfortable, you see why you are doing them. There are two ways you can live: you can devote your life to staying in your comfort zone, or you can work on your freedom
 
Ch 14 – Letting go of false solidity
 
Clinging creates the bricks and mortar with which we build a conceptual self. If you stop clinging, you will see why the tendency to cling was there.
 
Ch 15 – The path of unconditional happiness
 
In life, there is only one choice to make – Do you want to be happy? But we often confuse this with external conditions. The question really means is “Do you want to be happy irrespective of whatever happens?” Any condition you create will limit your happiness. 
 
Ch 16 – The spiritual path of nonresistance
 
Stress only happens when you resist life’s events. You are generally using will to resist – that which has already happened or which hasn’t happened yet
 
Ch17 – Contemplating death
 
You don’t need more time before death. Live every moment of you life and let it fill you completely
 
Happy Meditation!
 

Book Review – How to walk

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Thich Nhat Hanh books give me a sense of peace just by reading. That was the only selling point of this book for me. I picked this book for understanding how to adopt mindful walking into my life. But the book did not have any real tips. 

 

The book has a similar structure of ‘how to sit’. It is an easy read but reading it in one go defeats the purpose of the book. The best way to read this book is to read only one chapter a day to remind or motivate yourself to walk mindful daily. The book has a few anecdotes which get stuck in your head and push you to adopt mindful walking.

 

Notes

  • The first thing to do is lift your foot. Breathe in. Put your foot down, first your heel then your toes. Then breathe out.
  • When we return to our breathing, we return to the present which is our home.
  • Every time we take a step, we appreciate the solid earth underneath us
  • When we walk with others, the collective energy of mindfulness we generate is very powerful
  • Make a contract with staircase and walk mindfully whenever you walk on those stairs


Quotes

  • Most of us walk without any chains, yet we aren’t free

 

Happy Walking!

 

2020 July Review and August goals

July had been more about my professional life than about my personal life. I found it hard to strike a balance between the both. I was spending my free time also studying the concepts related to work. The initial struggle of doing things which are beyond your current capacity is sort of more intimidating than exciting. But this struggle goes on till I bring the level to challenging and only a bit outside my comfort zone.
 

Review of July

 
1.Anulom Vilom 
 
The major plan for July included doing Anulom Vilom daily after Kapalbhati. But in reality, I was running short of time after kapalbhati and was not really able to do anulom vilom right after that. So I moved this routine to night time just before sleeping. I did around 60 minutes of anulom vilom over the entire month which was much lower than what I had in mind. But since that set a baseline, this month, I am going to target 120 minutes of anulom vilom.
 
2.Reading gita
 
I instead attended gita classes for a few days but they turned out more about chanting hare rama hare krishna than learning the essence of gita. I had to pause it and get back to the book where I just went through the introduction and first chapter. I am afraid if the book is really helpful because it emphasises more on bhakti yoga for which I am not really ready yet.
 
3.Books
 
In July, my reading list was E-squared, Headspace guide to meditation, Prana and pranayama, The Life‑Changing Magic of Tidying Up, Miracle of mindfulness, What your clutter is trying to tell youTiny Habits, Biology of belief.
 
Completed a few and a few are still in progress. I will start publishing the book reviews soon.
 
4.Miscellaneous
 

  • I started writing in my gratitude diary that today is a new day with new opportunities. That sort of helped me deal with a crisis in work and helped me set the day on a positive tone.
  • I extended my gratitude diary to the night to write about the things I am grateful for in the day
  • I also started writing my goals (mostly the big ones) as I read that writing down your goals helps you look for opportunities to achieve them
  • I started meditating twice a day and extended mindfulness into daily routines. Looking forward to experiencing visible changes with this extended mindfulness practice.
  • I started keeping my phone inside the locker during working hours which has reduced the number of times I unlock the phone to half. This has not only reduced the mindless browsing and scrolling but also helped in spending the time in focusing on my breath
  • I started learning badminton. For now, I have learnt only wrist movements.

 

Plans for August

 
1.Mindful walking
 
As a part of my mindfulness practices, I want to focus on mindful walking next. I am always on the run. My friends often say that it is very difficult to walk at my speed. Now, if I reduce the speed of my footsteps, I can slow down the speed of my thoughts. 
 
To make this a habit, I will start with 10 mindful steps every morning. From the time I wake up from bed till I reach the bathroom, I will take mindful steps, breathing in and breathing out. In a day, when I stay at home, I walk around 4000 steps. In the beginning, converting everything to mindful steps might overwhelm me. So I will increase it by 20 steps every week. If I am able to do more, that is great. But the aim is to have the smallest number of steps to start with.
 
2.Thank you Notebook
 
For every person I have known so far, I will write a note in my personal notebook on why I am grateful for whatever they did for me. At the same time, I write a note why I should forgive the differences if there are any. This exercise is similar to what I planned last time but this time, I won’t be sending out any messages.That way, I will not hesitate to write down. 
 
I will do this exercise before my night gratitude exercise.
 
How was your July? What are your plans for August?
 
Happy August!
 

Book Review – Yoga Nidra

 
Yoga nidra is a gift to mankind which helps in easy relaxation. I have been fascinated by yoga nidra and went to great lengths to make it a point to attend group sessions on yoga nidra. The magic it created in me made me go back to it over and again. When I got a chance to read this book, I wanted to understand what are the variations I can use in my daily life without needing external help. 
 
I didn’t need to know about its uses because I practically received the benefits already. The book explained to me the reasons behind various instructions which I followed in the yoga nidra session. I didn’t know the requirement of why I should feel that my body is heavy and then again it is light before. Here I got to know that it is used to keep the mind alert. I didn’t know that order of rotation is important and I end up using my own convenient order. The order is important to establish pranic flow. All these days I have been scouring for methods to release energy from the suppressed feelings and here I get to know how the symbols used in yoga nidra already do the job for me.
 
Notes

  1. The ordinary things you do daily are not exactly relaxation in scientific terms
  2. There are 3 types of tensions – muscular, emotional,mental.Unless you relieve them, you will not feel refreshed even after a good night’s sleep
  3. If you are trying to change with your intellect, your results are superficial.
  4. Using sankalpas in yoga nidra, the author changed thousands of lives including criminals.
  5. Mind is extremely receptive in the state of yoga nidra. 
  6. A person’s basic nature can’t be changed. It can be observed looking at his spontaneous acts
  7. Sankalpa is a major aspect in yoga nidra. Using this, you can achieve your destiny
  8. Even though sankalpa can be used to eradicate bad habits, it should be used for achieving self actualization which in turn helps in eradicating the bad habits. A greater understanding of sankalpa is needed before it is put to use.
  9. This process brings you to watch the subconscious and unconscious levels of karma, samskaras. Experiences like levitation might also occur.
  10. It has the power to active extra sensorial perception
  11. Yoga nidra and hypnosis are not the same. In hypnosis, you go into deep sleep and the brain is completely shut down whereas in yoga nidra you don’t sleep and your brain is fully awake. Ida and pingala are closed in both hypnosis and yoga nidra but in hypnosis sushumna is also closed whereas in yoga nidra sushumna takes the work of ida and pingala.
  12. The order of rotation is important because it establishes a pranic flow
  13. The images which are provided in the yoga nidra session are meant to release the energy which repressed thoughts hold.
  14. It is advisable to record the instructions or use a guided tool initially because you don’t want the brain to be working in an active state trying to recollect the order.
  15. It can be also used in a short way as a divider between work life and home life

Further Reading

  1. Learn how to use mandalas to clear the archetypes

 
Yoga nidra is useful to increase your learning capacity, reduction in stress, intrauterine growth in pregnant woman, reduction in hypertension, control of psychosomatic diseases, depression including suicide prevention and much more.
What are you waiting for? Go ahead and read the book to understand the science. If you don’t need the theory, record your own audio of the original instructions or use guided audios to start practising yoga nidra twice a day. 
Happy relaxation!
 

Book Review – What your clutter is trying to tell you

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After reading The Life changing magic of tidying up, I wanted to read deeper books on decluttering. Reading the description of what is your clutter trying to tell you, I felt that this book will have answers to the questions I had in mind. I won’t consider this as a mind opening book except for the concept of boundary setting. From the culture I come from, boundary setting is the rudest thing you can ever do. But this is what I needed to hear. This one concept made the book a good read for me. The other good points in the book is the way Richardson points out how the physical clutter you hold is related to the mental beliefs you hold. The book has action points for each chapter to make you do the thinking. Rest of the book is just okay. It is short and easy. I was half expecting Richardson to write a story on his journey of moving from 2000 sq ft to 230 sq ft but that story has not been discussed in detail.
 
The book starts with making the reader think about the clutter and the ways in which it might be telling a story which the reader is ignoring. It sets the tone to go deeper into understanding the clutter. Then he moves on to the inner critic we all have and how we find it difficult to get past the comfort zone, in this case, living with clutter. Then he mentions the top cluster hotspots and causes of them. In the next chapter, he addresses the causes of clutters in depth where he talks about the boundary setting. Later on, he provides insights on how we hold on to clutter since we can’t get rid of certain beliefs. In the last two chapters, he addresses how to get rid of the clutter.
 
Notes:

  • Causes of clutter
    • Excess weight is usually a protection from other’s energy, painful relationships and nasty self-talk
    • Physical clutter is sometimes the side effect of draining relationships. It is usually caused by the emotional clutter
    • Car clutter tells that you are constantly on the run
    • Hidden clutter is always calling for your attention and fuels your inner critic on what you should be doing
  • Boundary setting – Practise disappointing challenge by saying no at least 3 times a day. Start with low risk relationships. Say no whenever you don’t really want to help and if helping drains your energy
  • Statistically, we wear 20% of our clothes 80% of the time. It is time to regularly declutter the clothes you no longer wear
  • Even though it is tough, declining hand me downs which are an obligation help you save clutter
  • Look out for I might need this someday syndrome, retail therapy ( buying goods to feel better)
  • When you keep items gifted by old relationships which you no longer have, they take up the energy which prevents the formation of new relationships

To think:

  • If clutter were no longer an obstacle, what would you then have time for? 
  • We pile on the stories in our minds, making it bigger, heavier, and more intimidating than it needs to be
  • Do you believe it is not spiritual to have financial abundance?
  • Fear of rejection is a reason you can’t lose weight
  • Sometimes the person you need to forgive is yourself
  • She is not an asshole. She is just wounded.

 
Further reading

  • The art of extreme self care

 

Book Review – The Life-Changing Magic of Tidying Up

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I had great expectations from the book when I picked it up. It came up in many book recommendations and it was one of the famous books on the subject of decluttering. But I was disappointed. I finished the book in one night as there was not really any engaging content. The author goes on and on about her obsession for tidying up and how she chose a profession which involves that and helps clients tidy up without a rebound. She randomly quotes examples of different clients and their clutter. Then she ends the book saying there are no real rules except for deciding for yourself what you really need. The book and her profession looked like works on only one principle of the nudge a person needs to clean up. She doesn’t talk anywhere about how to prevent the new things from piling up after the clutter is cleared to prevent the rebound she keeps mentioning in the book.
 
The best thing I like about the book is the author asks you to visualize how you want the house to be and then start discarding everything which doesn’t bring you any joy.
 

Notes

 
Mistakes in tidying up

  • Tidying up by location instead of category
  • Sending the clutter to parents
  • Keep things  “just because”
  • Folding seems like extra work because you will wear it again

 
Tips

  • Designate a spot for every category in the house
  • The proper order is to place the clothes that are lighter in colour at the front and gradually progress to darker colours at the back
  • Fold each piece of clothing into a simple rectangle
  • Use photos, posters and ornaments to decorate the inside of cupboards
  • No music while cleaning up the house
  • Easy first and difficult ones last
  • If you feel someone else is untidy check yourself first
  • Visit model homes, ideal lifestyle
  • Hanging takes up more space than folding

 
Other benefits

  • People lost weight after letting go off the clutter

 
Food for thought

  • Letting go is even more important than adding
  • We attend seminars because we feel the passion of teacher and experience the learning environment
  • When we fold we should put heart into it and thank clothes for protecting our bodies
  • What you wear in the house impacts your self image
  • An attachment to past or anxiety about the future

 
Further reading 

  • Learn more about Feng shui
  • The art of discarding by Nagisa Tatsumi

 
Happy Tidying up!
 

2020 June Review & July Goals

The first half of 2020 has been tough for all of us. Under pressure, you either break or have a breakthrough. If you continue to look at yourself and the world around you the same way as you always did, you might just break. Coming out of your comfort zone and looking at everything else including yourself as an outsider might give you a breakthrough. The one thing which helped me survive this half year was my perspective to look at things as an outsider. Will you give it a try?
 

Review of June

 
1.Physical Health
 
In June, I wanted to increase the number of Surya Namaskaras I do daily. But only after starting it, I realised that the quality matters more than the quantity. Initially I started off with 5 rounds daily, doing them for the heck of it but that didn’t feel right over the time. I slowed down and did just one round a day. But I made sure that I was breathing right and stayed for a longer time in each pose. That made me feel satisfied.
 
2.Mental Health
 
Even though I had been pracitising Kapalbhathi seriously from March, I was not able to do it for more than 3 minutes. This month, just by increasing it by one everyday, I made it to 18 minutes. But later when I read about how it generates a lot of heat in the body, I limited it to 15 a day. My breathing has never been so deeper and clearer.
 
Another task, I planned for the month was to forgive and thank people. Forgiving the past mistakes when times are good didn’t really make a huge difference for me. Thanking people for no occasion also felt weird. I dropped these two exercises in the first 10 days. May be I will pick them up later when the time is right.
 
3.Books
 
I was busy with my academic research proposal and could not find time to read the other books much. I finished Visualization for weight loss and Emotion code. Currently reading yoga nidra, Psycho Cybernetics and Intention Experiment.
 
4.Courses
 
I have been heavily investing my time in picking up python coding skills from various courses on Coursera. Challenging yourself beyond your comfort zone makes you feel accomplished.
 

Plans for July

 
1.Physical health
 
I have started a 30 days split challenge. Each day, I do a set of exercises which help in opening up the hip flexors. With the amount of time spent in the chair looking at the screen, working on splits helps in relieving the lower back pain. Technically, achieving splits in 30 days is an overachievement. Realistically, I will keep trying for 90 days to see the outcome.
 
2.Mental Health
 
a) Anulom Vilom
 
After practising Kapalbhati and enjoying the fruits of it, I want to extend it to Anulom Vilom to make it a complete package.
 
b) Reading Gita
 
One of my friends mentioned that reading Bhagavad gita was a life changing experience for him. I may not be able to finish it this month, but I am going to put it on my desk and read a verse now and then during the breaks I take from office work.
 
How was your June? What are your plans for July?
 
Happy July!

2020 May review and June Goals

May hasn’t been the month it was planned to be like. It has taken me by surprise and unlocked a new version of me.
 

Review of May

 
1.Book Reviews
 
I wrote 6 book reviews against the target of 12. I barely reached my goal. But that is completely okay. Writing book reviews for books which I didn’t make notes meant that I go through the book from scratch again and write notes. It was good to revisit the books once again but given other schedules it didn’t seem a priority. It was also not helping the very reason I chose to write which was to get back to writing. 
 
2.Cooking
 
The best thing that happened to me this month was that I finally started cooking a variety of dishes rather than living on dal chawal. It not only kept my mouth watering but also helped in flow of my creative juices. For a year, I was just surviving on the minimum varieties I knew and now I am able to make every dish which comes to my mind. This was a part of me which I never saw before. I am glad cooking happened to me finally.
 
3.Books
 
The only book I could finish this month is Letting go. The rest of the books which I am reading are Blink, Practising power of now, 100 side hustles, Frequency – Power of Personal Vibration, Future board, Asana Pranyama Mudra Bandha
 
Now that I am back into the habit of writing book reviews, you can expect reviews of the above books as and when I finish them.
 
4.Miscellaneous 
 
I received 3 months unlimited coursera access which got me to binge watch courses leaving me no time for voraciously reading books. I will also write reviews of the non academic courses and also share my learnings in the upcoming articles.
 
Lockdown has given me the chance to get in touch with a few old friends who certified that they can see a visible change in me from the time we last spoke a few years ago. That was a definite boost to strive for continuous improvement.
 

Plans for June

 
Though the initial plan was to stick to only one activity per month, since I am going to work from home for the rest of the year given the pandemic situation, I chose to expand the targets.
 
1.Physical health
 
I currently practise body weight exercises and am happy with the progress I made. But I want to add a bit of yoga also to my routine to make it a part of my identity. The main target for the month is to start with 3 rounds of Surya Namaskara daily and increase the number by one daily based on the comfort level. I don’t have an end target number to reach but I just want to focus on pushing myself to the next comfortable level of rounds instead of just sticking to one.
 
2.Mental health
 
a) Thank you letter
 
I am going to write a thank you letter to every person who made a difference to my life even if it is in the smallest possible way. This activity is inspired from my gratitude diary which has helped me stay sane through this lockdown. While growing up, I was never taught to express love. Now when I have to express all of this, it sort of feels weird. But then I think I will go ahead and bring a smile on a dear one’s face in this tough time.
 
b) Forgive
 
We block a lot of good things in life because we hold on to regrets. From the book, Letting go, I realised that one of the most important ways to increase your energy level is to remove all these blocks. Since I was clueless on how to let go, I chose to follow 21 days forgiveness plan by Vanzant. Apart from that, whoever I write a thank you letter to, I will write a forgiving letter but won’t send it to them. That way, I will genuinely feel good about the thank you letter after letting go of the entire resentments I hold.
 
I am totally excited to unlock the next level of flexibility in my body and unblock my energy blockages by forgiving and letting go the resentments and spreading smiles through the thank you letters.
 
How was your May? What are your plans for June?
 
Happy June! 
 

Book review- Letting Go : The Pathway To Surrender

After reading all the books on mindfulness, the secret behind staying in the present is letting go of the past. I searched for practical tips on letting go and found this book.
 
Hawkins gives you a different perspective towards how to approach life and explains each of them with examples on how it changed lives and quotes the research material wherever available. 
 
In retrospection, this is not a book to read as a nighttime story and get done with.I haven’t learnt letting go by the time I was done with it. There is no step by step instruction or everyday exercises which I can follow to make it a practice. That was a disappointment for me. Otherwise, the various other information about emotions and energy levels was quite useful for me as I have been searching for books on that topic since a very long time. According to my understanding, you are majorly stuck at one level, but we can fluctuate between various levels throughout the day. 
 
You can benefit from the book, if you read it for the first time to understand the content and pick it up again to read one concept at a time and absorb it deeply and make it a part of your identity before you move to the next one.
 

Detailed Review

 
Chapter 1 – Introduction
 
The foreword and preface were boring enough to question my choice of picking up the book. But when I read the plethora of options people choose to deal with life from psychotherapy to meditation and everything in between but nothing seems to work for them, that is when I fell in love with the book. I thought Hawkins was going to introduce me to something which I haven’t tried before. But after that he again bores you with high promises being made on how he is going to make your life better without coming to the point.
 
Chapter 2 – The Mechanism of Letting go
 
This chapter was mind opening for me. I wonder why no one taught how to handle emotions back at school. Hawkins says that there are three ways to handle emotions : suppression, expression and escape. If you ever wondered how Netflix sustains itself, it lives off on your need to escape from emotions.  All the heart attacks at a young age are from the repressed and suppressed feelings. You are mistaken like me if you thought expressing is the best way to deal with feelings. When you express, you are giving the feeling greater energy to take over your life and also the remnants of expression are going to be suppressed.
 
“Letting go involves being aware of a feeling, letting it come up, staying with it, and letting it run its course without wanting to make it different or do anything about it.”
 
Now this sounds so simple. But how to do it in real is why I picked this book. How do I know when I am resisting the feeling or letting it run its course?
 
“To be surrendered means to have no strong emotion about a thing: “It’s okay if it happens, and it’s okay if it doesn’t.”
 
Now this is the crux of Bhagavad Gita too, do your work and don’t expect the results.
 
Chapter 3 – The Anatomy of Emotions
 
Here is where it gets interesting. I only knew before that there are negative, neutral and positive emotions. But Hawkins introduces you to a scale of emotions with an energy tag for each of them. Lowest on the scale is Shame and highest is Peace. In this chapter, he only gives a brief description of each. Anything which is below the level of courage is negative. At the level of courage, you repairing one area of your life helps in other areas of life too.
 
Chapter 4 – Apathy and depression
 
Starting with this chapter, he gives a detailed description to give yourself a reality check on where you stand in the energy scale and what you can do to embrace the let go technique.
 
1.I can’t vs I won’t
 
“Most “I can’ts” are really “I won’ts.” Behind the “I can’ts” or the “I won’ts” is frequently a fear. Then, when we look at the truth of what is behind the feeling, we have already moved up the scale from apathy to fear.”
 
2.Blame – Playing the victim card
 
“One of the laws of consciousness is: We are only subject to a negative thought or belief if we consciously say that it applies to us. We are free to choose not to buy into a negative belief system.”
 
“when we let go of blame, we experience forgiveness.”
 
3.Getting the positive energy
 
“choose to be with other persons who have resolved the problem with which we struggle”
 
Chapter 5 – Grief
 
“ Acceptance is different from resignation. Resignation says, “I don’t like it, but I have to put up with it.”
 
“God, Grant me the
Serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the
Courage to change the things I can, and the
Wisdom to know the difference.”
 
“Where am I looking to get love rather than to give it?”
 
“Internal joy comes from pleasure of giving and loving then we are really invulnerable to loss”
 
Chapter 6 – Fear
 
“What one holds in mind tends to manifest. What this means is that any thought which we consistently hold in mind and consistently give energy to will tend to come into our life according to the very form in which our mind has held it.”
 
“The more fear we hold, the more fearful situations we attract to our life”
 
Chapter 7 – Desire
 
“the essential point of freedom is whether we have chosen consciously to fulfil a certain want, or whether we are just being blindly run by unconscious programs and belief systems.”
 
“Desire, especially strong desire (e.g., cravingness), frequently blocks our getting what we want.”
 
“identify the goals and then let go of wanting them”
 
“the unconscious will allow us to have only what we think we deserve”
 
Chapter 8 – Anger
 
“The way to offset this anger is to acknowledge and relinquish the pride, surrender our desire for the pleasure of self-pity and, instead, view our efforts on behalf of others as gifts. We can experience the joy of being generous with others as its own reward.”
 
Chapter 9 – Pride
 
“The attempt to suppress pride out of guilt simply does not work.”
 
“Pride is sometimes seen as a motivator of achievement, what would be its higher level substitute? One answer would be joy. What is wrong with joy as the reward for successful achievement, rather than pride?”
 
Chapter 10 – Courage
 
This chapter doesn’t have any suggestions. It only talks about how great a state courage is to be in.
 
“On the level of courage, we really start becoming conscious. It dawns on us that we have the freedom and the capacity to choose.”
 
Chapter 11 – Acceptance
 
“I’m okay,” “You’re okay,” and “It’s okay.”
 
Chapter 12 – Love
 
“Forgiveness is an aspect of love that allows us to see life events from the viewpoint of grace.”
 
“Out of humility, all opinions about others are surrendered”
 
Chapter 13 – Peace
 
It is a state achieved by people like Buddha. Just good to know about it but might be impractical to reach it.
 
Chapter14-Chapter 20
 
From here on, it is loads of theory backed by research and examples. You can feel free to skip these chapters unless you are not convinced that letting go works.
 
Happy letting go!