NikithaHappiness is in letting go!
Recently, I realised that the power of your happiness and peace of mind lies in not letting desires control you. In the past, I was always chasing something or the other. I choose a goal and chase it like my life depended on it. If I don’t achieve it due to some external circumstances, I would go mad. As of today, I haven’t stopped dreaming. But I don’t chase my goals. I just do my part and let them unfold as they can. It might look like I am being passive and not doing anything about my goals. But in fact, I am giving my best in the areas I can and not controlling what I can’t. This one lesson I wish I had learnt earlier. I feel proud of how far I have come in life from that younger self who was harsh on herself for things beyond her control.
Now, I feel content most of the time. It is a beautiful feeling to experience.
Highlights of May
1.Vacation
I was expecting the vacation to be relaxing but it was quite the opposite to that. It was exciting and adventurous. I enjoyed snow for the first time. Discovered new strength in my body that I could survive high altitude of 17,800 ft and extreme temperatures like close to 0 degrees. After all the adventurous part, the cultural part of the trip felt boring. But overall, we discovered a lot of new birds, currently estimating the number to be close to 30 but couldn’t make time yet to go through the photos and share them on social media.
The not so good part of the trip was me not having a clarity of what to expect out of the trip. There were times I wasn’t sure why I was putting my body through so much torture with those extreme climatic conditions and not eating food properly and on time. My whole intention of mindfulness was not so successful. Falling sick for a week after returning from the trip made me question the whole point of a vacation. It also reminded me that if I really want to go round the world, 30’s is the time. For all the stamina I have built, I am not sure if I would have any energy left in my 40’s to do any of this.
The unexpected part of the trip was me accessing my family layer. Root chakra is the most difficult to work on as we as an individual are heavily dependent on our families and societies. Trying to separate our beliefs from theirs and standing up for that is a task in itself.
For me, there was this constant voice which was telling me what my mom would have done and said throughout the trip and then I had to keep asking myself what is it that I want, how do I want to live life differently and how are my values different from my family. This entire process was a game changer and helped me unlock the next level of my spiritual growth.
2.Goal setting
When 2022 kicked in, I was still not sure of what I wanted out of this year. I was more or less still aimless and set goals where my heart was not invested. But when I started journaling for my birthday, the clear goals evolved for me. I designed a workshop based on the process I go through for goal setting. My workshop basically focuses on why you were not able to achieve it so far and how to make a difference this time. Register here, if you are interested.
3.“I am not a victim”
In a lot of my workshops, I include at least one slide related to this to explain what it actually means and how to not fall in trap of this. Then, I noticed from time to time whenever I am unhappy, I go through a “I am a victim” phase. It is difficult but it is worth asking yourself every time you are unhappy, “Am I feeling like a victim? What can I do to stop feeling that?”
Goals for June
1. Physical Exercise
One of the things I realized from my vacation is that I don’t have enough stamina to climb elevations. Once my ankle heals, I will prioritize climbing stairs and running on other elevated surfaces in a trackable manner.
Apart from this, I am searching for a personal trainer who can help me correct my posture and create a routine for me to follow. If you know any, do let me know.
In the meantime, I will be reading up books on the science of exercise too to gain some understanding by myself because there is something I am doing fundamentally wrong to not be able to see results.
2. Data Science Preparation
I chalked up the plan for part 2 of preparation along with analyzing my mental blockers. Looking forward to the next 4 months of deepening my knowledge.
3. Runes
When I first read about runes, I heard of the lady collecting her own pebbles from a river side and creating them on her own. That dream came true for me when I visited Sikkim and collected pebbles in a similar way. I am going to meditate on each of the nordic symbols to understand their meaning better.
4. Dream work
It has been 4 months of dream work and I have collected a lot of data so far. Some of my dreams come true, some are messages to be delivered for others and the rest of them are my unconscious fears. Now that this has become a part of my life, I will be creating a template to analyze them better.
How was your May? What are your plans for June?
Happy June!