Nikitha
Who does not want to be that one who is admired by everyone?
Everyone wants it. It is human nature too. Being valued and having healthy relations increases happiness by multiple-folds.
But many don’t know how to go about it.
The following are the characteristics I have noticed in people who are usually admired.
You can pick up a few and make them a part of you. You will start noticing the difference.
Do’s:
Be a good listener:
A lot of people look for someone who they can trust. All they expect from you is to listen. They are not looking for solutions. So just keep nodding your head and ask a few good questions at the end of the conversation.
Even if it is a normal conversation, listen attentively. I have the habit of interrupting the other person when they talk for the fear of forgetting the point I want to make. It annoys people a lot. They don’t like to be interrupted. Let the other person complete and then talk. I have been trying to do it too.
Ask more and talk less:
People love to talk about themselves. Ask relevant questions to what they are talking. One good conversation is sufficient to make them like you. Don’t keep giving unsolicited advice: The less you talk, the more the value you get. Nothing in abundance is ever valued. Diamonds are precious because they are rare.
Mirror the other person:
If the other person has the habit of touching his nose or skin, do the similar thing in a subtle way. He should not notice you doing it consciously but should notice it subconsciously.Copy his tone too. If he is talking softly, talk in the same pace.
Talk in their mother tongue:
The person whom you are talking to will feel alive when you talk in their mother tongue. They feel an immediate connection.
Show your support through silence:
When someone is pain, they just want to grieve. All they need is a support and not comforting words. Just be there for them and don’t stop them from grieving.
Do something interesting in your life:
Do something different from what everyone else does. One of my friends attends cycling events. Another friend has written 2 books. There is another one who acts in short films. They have their routines going on. But still they do something different. The remaining friends of mine admire the above mentioned friends for the variety in their life. The friends who made their lives interesting have new stories to tell all the time.
Be jovial:
Make fun of yourself. Talk about everyday life in a funny way. Make light comments. Cheer up those who are around you. It is easier said than done. You need to actually observe such people and emulate them till you pick up your own style in it.
Provide right advice at right time:
Every time I am faced with a dilemma, I have a few specific friends for specific problems. I go to them because they tell me the right words at the right time. Gain a lot of experience, understand situation from others shoes and advise them. They will rememb
er you for a life time.
Make them feel cared:
Show genuine interest in the well-being of others. Take in-charge of bad situations and provide amicable solutions to all the parties involved. You will be liked by both the sides.
Live by your words and values:
Be boldly honest:
Being honest is easy. But being honest even after knowing that you might lose something or someone forever, is amazing. It really needs strong value system to be that. You will have the right friends. And you will be loved by the right set of people.
Carry a graceful smile irrespective of the grief in the heart:
Who does not have a problem? It is how you respond to it makes all the difference. Everyone knows this too. But very few actually follow it. Be the one who follows it. The smiling one is always easy to approach. Hence more likable.
Keep ego aside:
Learn to maintain a balance between self-respect and ego. Know when to apologize and when to not. You will automatically start learning how to behave where. People will admire you for the way you carry yourself.
Don’ts:
Please everyone:
It is a good thing to make other person happy. But in the process of being likable don’t end up pleasing everyone. You will feel miserable and might turn into an arrogant and cold person.
Spend money on them:
You will only attract a lot of false friends with this. It is okay to help the friends who are in dire need of money for existence. In all other cases, you better avoid it.
Irrespective of what you do to be likable, don’t forget that you are doing it because you are enjoying the process too. If you aren’t, the pleasure of being likable is not worth the pain of being not yourself.
Happy being the admired one!