Happiness

The first thing to do after a massive failure

I failed a lot of times in my life.
Even though for a lot of people it does not look like failure, it was failure for me.
I failed to achieve realistic and achievable goals I set for myself.


Have you failed any time in life?


If you have never failed in life, you either did not set goals up to your level or you were strategies just happened to work in the right way.


If you are not setting goals up to your standards, you need to do it right now. Aim for something beyond your comfort level. Go ask your crush on a date. Demand a hike from your boss. Aim to be an all rounder at work.


If your strategies are just working right, you have learnt very little in life. The day they stop working for you, you are dead on the spot. Because you have never seen what reality is like. You have been taking minimal risks and happily getting along.


But if you have failed in life, failed really hard that life slapped you on your face and you thought there was no way you can stand on your legs again. I congratulate you. I am proud of you that you are alive and started your life from scratch again. I admire you because you have the potential to start any time from the bottom. Because what you have seen was just a trailer. Life is going to show you the movie soon. And I know you are ready for it.


Here is what I did after I failed multiple times in life:


Get some physical exercise:


This is my most favourite thing. I go on long walks and I keep walking until I am tired. Once when I flunked an exam, I walked from the exam centre till my home. I was too tired physically to indulge in self-pity. I was sane by the next morning.


Shut yourself from the world:


The last thing you need is sympathy. Your life did not end. You need neither self-pity nor sympathy. You are perfectly alright. If you feel a loss, make use of a diary.
I really hate it when people from all over the world send messages and make calls as soon as the results are announced. They are not concerned about you, they are just curious. You don’t need people who are curious about your life. Just switch off the damn phone.

Spend time with a loved one:


No, not for sympathy. Not for telling that you are awesome. Meet that friend who takes you to the best dessert place or the latest movie as if nothing happened at all. The world did not end. You need to distract your mind from what happened to you.
My parents don’t bother me with the result. They talk to me as if it was just another day. Their casual talk is what brings me back to normal.

Create the next opportunity:


You might not get another opportunity. But you can always create one. You can become better than before which makes you more valuable.


What should you not do?


Analysing what went wrong:


This is a step which should definitely be done. But not immediately after a failure. The more time you spend on this, the more you are beating yourself up. It is okay to fail. You need not brainstorm on it. You have given your best. There was nothing you could have done better. But if there are a few things think about them after you become normal.


Are you ready to set your next goal?


Happy embracing failure!

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